Ok, I’m going to let it all out!
Unless you didn’t get it from my last post, I hired a life coach.
No, way!
You call yourself a life coach and you hired one for yourself?
Well, are doctors doing their own diagnostics? Are dentists able to do their own root canals?
The point of the matter is that, whoever you are, and whatever you do, you’re going to need the help of someone outside of you at times.
That’s just the way it is.
I know all too well, that another coach would be able to help me pin point few things that I need to clear up in my life.
Actually, it’s because I’m a coach myself that I am aware of what I need to clear, as opposed to most people out there who are actually NOT aware.
One issue that I have been having my whole life that came up very quickly in my first conversation with my coach, is that I have always expected the other shoe to drop.
Looking back in my life, I’ve had some incredible experiences, and I have even been pretty fortunate more often than not, yet, I’ve always carried that damaging subconscious belief that I shouldn’t expect too much, or else!
I’ve always been afraid of being too happy for fear of losing something precious.
As long as I maintained a sucky enough life, with good health, bad relationships, good times here and there, just enough money, and just enough unhappiness I would be OK.
Does that sound familiar?
Well, I’m asking, because I know that it is for many, many people out there.
But who would Consciously do that to Themselves?
No one!
You see. That’s the thing. No one in their right mind, would do such thing consciously, but we do it all the time, unconsciously.
This has been my a subconscious programming of mine.
And even though I’ve kind of known that, it’s became all the more clearer, when my coach pointed out to me that basically, I have always made sure that I was never too successful, so nothing too bad would happen to me.
Wow, she put her finger on it!
That’s been my life story.
You see, there is that voice in my head, silently planted in my mind, that’s been saying to me that all good things come with a price.
So, actually, this was my home work for the week.
I had to write a story titled “All Good Things Come With A Price.”
It didn’t matter if it was a true or a made up story, as long as I wrote a story, with a beginning, a middle and an end that would prove that all good things come with a price.
This is part of a plan of course.
It has nothing to do with the truth of the matter, but with what I unconsciously believe to be true.
I teach that to my own clients and readers through this blog for a while now.
But I had to admit to myself, that this is a deep down subconscious belief that has been shaping my life, in such a way, that I’m no longer accepting.
I have come to a place in my life where I will no longer accept to be the Muppet of my subconscious programming, that’s why I’ve decided to do something about it, once and for all.
Where does this Belief Come from?
Pretty easy, actually.
I KNOW where it comes from.
Want to guess?
Well, where do most of our beliefs come from?
I think you know…
Yes, that’s right!
Most of our subconscious beliefs come from our childhood.
As children, between the ages of 0-16, we are very vulnerable. A child between 0 and 7 years old is like a sponge, absorbing everything that’s going on around them.
The problem is that as children, we learn mostly subconsciously, and very little consciously, actually.
That’s why we learn our mother tongue so easily. We learn it mostly subconsciously.
That’s why it’s much harder to learn a second language as an adult, because we learn that language consciously.
That’s also why we never forget our mother tongue. I can testify to that.
When it comes to good things such as a language, that’s perfect. The subconscious does it job and it works wonderfully.
The problem is that when the exact same thing happens with bad stuff.
Whatever bad experience we learned a lesson from, as a child, it’s pretty much planted in our mind, just like our mother tongue. And unless someone points it out to you, and you agree that’s a piece of garbage that you want to throw out, it’s there to stay.
People have lived and died with such beliefs from the beginning of human history.
Think about people you know, just for a minute, and I’m sure you can think of someone.
Don’t you?
We all do.
Maybe it’s you!
Why in my World Good Things have Price
One of the heavy burden that I’ve been carrying around is that good things come with a price.
And, yes, I know where it comes from.
When I’ll tell you my little story, I know that you will say, oh, but of course!
So her it is…
When I was five years old and my brother was two, it seems that our parents had finally reach a point where they were well off enough financially to buy a brand new car (a Mercedes nonetheless), and we were about to go to Italy for a whole month vacation that upcoming July, with the brand new Mercedes.
Some very good things were on the horizon for us. Indeed!
However, on March 26, my father got killed in a car crash.
The car that he was driving smashed into a truck and that ended his life.
That summer we never went to Italy and my mother had to cancel the Mercedes.
The car was ordered but not home yet, so she sent one of my uncles to cancel everything.
You see, experiences such as this, especially when you’re 5 years old, teach you something.
What’s more is that it teaches your subconscious something.
In this case, this particular experience taught me that … All good things come with a price.
There was the Programming
I didn’t have a clue about that at the time, of course, but back then, I subconsciously learned that when things are about to get too good, something bad is going to happen.
The subconscious mind doesn’t think, evaluate or make any sort of difference between true and false or right and wrong. It just register what IS and shape itself based on that.
My subconscious mind registered: Luxurious band new car + dream vacation + good times on the horizon = something very bad happen.
Now, you need to understand that our subconscious mind’s role is to protect us. But it can only protect us based on its programming.
To protect me, my subconscious made sure that I’ll never get to the point of having it all, so nothing too bad would happen to me.
This type of subconscious programming will make sure that you never truly become successful.
Unless?
Well, unless, you break that subconscious belief and get rid of it for good.
Now, do you imagine how many people walking this earth have this type of subconscious beliefs?
More than you would care to count.
That’s why so many people do need a coach
I truly feel that all these years, I’ve lived with that subconscious programming that always allowed me to have just enough, but never too much… so nothing too bad would happen to me.
I can think of many different times of my life where this has been exactly the case.
However, I’ve had it now, and I know too darn much about the whole subconscious mind process, and how coaching works along with that, to let that problem preventing me to be fully successful and get to where I want to go.
If you want to learn from my own experience, I’ll take you with me on my journey of removing a huge subconscious belief of mine.
Don’t you think this could help YOU?
If you’d like a one on one session with me, just contact me.
In the meantime, leave your thoughts and comments below…
Wonderful post Sylviane!
I love the depth you dug to in this post. I imagine that many who read it will see themselves in your story and will be inspired to access their own inner stories!
Personally, I find I relate so well to posts like this where the writer opens a bit and allows themselves to be vulnerable in front of their audience. It makes you so very real and accessible! I’m sure some of your readers will feel a connection with you after reading this, and will also potentially see you as someone who can help them dig into their own stumbling blocks!
Warmly,
Deborah
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Hi Deborah,
Now I wonder who inspired me to write this type of post? 🙂
It is true I often don’t open as much as I would like in my posts, because I know that some people who read my them (at times) are people which I don’t necessarily want to. If that makes sense.
But that’s the pros and cons about being on the internet, you can’t control who sees your stuff, and that problem is not going to be around forever either. But that’s why.
Yes, my goal was to speak to those who might feel exactly what I’m mentioning here. I hope some people will.
I was wondering if you’s see that post yourself, and I see you didn’t miss it. Thanks for coming and for your comment.
Hi Sylviane,
I didn’t know you had lost your father at a young age like this. I’m so sorry about that. My grandfather passed away when I was ten years old and it was so hard to process at that age.
I can understand how a tragedy like that could affect your subconscious thinking. I think I would have done the same thing.
Thank you for sharing such a personal story with us. On the flip side like Deborah said in her comments, it shows you’re geniuine and why you would be the one person who can help anyone who finds themselves in this position.
I hope you’re having a great week. Slyviane. Can you believe the month is coming to an end already?
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Hi Corina,
Well, I’m glad you enjoyed my more personal post. I do think that the genuineness of it is transparent.
I lost all my grand parents before by the time I turned 4, so it wasn’t traumatic for me, but at the same time I don’t have much of those nice memories with my grandparents as many people have.
Yes, time flies by like crazy, but I can’t wait for winter to be over 🙂
Thanks so much for coming.
Hi SYLVIANE
There is a wise saying that Iron sharpens Iron so it isn’t surprising that you hired a life coach.
I guess you put your personality in this post and you did reveal some interesting facts about the human mind.
You are right that we learn thing at a young age and it builds in our subconscious mind without us realizing it. I do that the mind can be reprogrammed but the process can be hard if one tries to do it on its own which is why we need help from a life coach. Thanks you as I was touched by your this awesome post.
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Hi Ikechi,
You are very correct, Ikechi, it’s hard to get subconscious beliefs out unless we seriously work at it with a professional. Well said, iron sharpens iron 🙂
Thanks for coming 🙂
Hi Sylviane,
Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I immediately learned so much from that and this is why it is so great sometimes to share a personal experience. Wow…You reached that point in your subconscious mind to free yourself to create more abundance.
Yes, we can know things consciously, but that subconscious of ours needs to be cleaned out if something is blocking us. I am a firm believer of that as you know.
When we experience things as a child, it really sticks in…I have been re-programmed many times with that stubborn subconscious of mind. Each time I did it, it was like a heavy weight lifted.
But it sometimes never ends. Other things pop up as we go on our journey of life, and when something is stopping us, we need coaching.
Thanks for this and all you do!
-Donna
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Hi Donna,
One day a computer programmer told me that it’s way easier to prevent a virus to get into a computer than it is to remove it.
Well, we are very much like a computer. That’s why it’s very important to program our children’s subconscious mind the “right way” so to speak, because once bad stuff get it, it’s going to be tough to get it out.
However, there is little we can do when events such the one of my father’s death happen. The only way out of that is to clear my subconscious of this shitty belief 🙂
But like you’re saying, it’s not always easy, and it might tried to sneak back in in different ways. That’s why it’s pretty much impossible to get rid of such things on our own. But I do believe that with enough will it’s possible.
Thank you so much for your input, Donna.
Hi Sylviane,
Sorry to hear about your father. Yes, I know you lost him when you were very young, but how it all happened can surely leave a deep impact on a young mind.
You are right about all that you mentioned, and most of it is the unseen, unheard kind of fear that stops us from progressing. Yes the conscious and subconscious, both playing their parts. Reminds me of the accident I had a few years back, though I was saved even with a horrible head injury -but that incident one can relate to the trip you mentioned, as it was a fun, holiday trip for us too – and in our brand new car!
However, to break that fear, especially for the kids, we DO take such trips and started doing them often. The thoughts remain, the incidence is on our mind too, but we break that circle of fear and move ahead, or you just can’t move over.
Thanks for sharing. Have a nice week ahead 🙂
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Hi Harleena,
Yes, you know all too well how traumatic events like that could be, but I’m glad you didn’t let it bring you down, and kept going on holiday trips.
Thank you so much for your input and have a wonderful day!
Sorry to hear that you had to lose your father at such a young age. That just goes to show how such huge events like that shape our individual lives in unique and life-altering ways. I lost my first grandparent at age ten, but luckily my father is still here. He gave me a kidney when I was a teenager and if he had been gone, my life would have been so much different. Life is unfair in all sorts of ways, but it does just go to show, my cousins and I were just discussing this, how our minds are like hard-drives of computers and memories and events are stored in there, from the very beginnings of childhood, even before we knew it.
I know it can be hard to open up and some do it more than others online. My blog is all about touching people on that most personal of levels, so I do more than most, but hopefully in a very relatable manner.
Thanks for sharing this perspective of yours with us.WOW!
Hi Kerry,
Wow, I didn’t know that you had a kidney transplant from your father. What a beautiful gesture of love. It’s like he gave you life twice.
Yes, our mind is like a computer drive, and if we don’t like what’s there, we need to do lots of erasing, I guess. I’ve done and still do some of that.
Thank you for your input, Kerry, and have a wonderful week ahead.
Hi Sylviane,
I want to congratulate you for hiring a coach, being open to their teachings and sharing your very personal struggle with us. That takes courage but it also helps us to recognize and understand that we all have issues, at times buried deep down inside.
I am SO glad that your coach is helping you resolve this way of thinking that you’ve had all these years. I know personally that you have so much to give and continue teaching us all that this is the way to expand on your already exceptional talent.
I know that at times you haven’t felt comfortable sharing a lot of your life with us for certain reasons but I’m glad that you are putting that all aside now. Your own experiences can help so many others understand why they may have deep seeded issues as well. It’s proof too that we all need the support of a really good coach to help bring that out in us. I sure know I do.
I can only see amazing things on the horizon for you now. I hate that you had to go through that as a child and especially losing your Dad at such a young age. It’s the lessons we learn from it all though I suppose though. Dead is never pleasant or enjoyable to experience but it’s part of life I’m afraid. As much as I hate it, it just is.
Thanks for sharing this with us my dear and I’m eager to learn so many more lessons from you this year too.
~Adrienne
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Hi Adrienne,
As it’s said somewhere in the Bible, there is a time for everything, and these past few years I’ve not taken care of myself much. It was all about my furry children (and I’ll do that all over again in a heart beat) and even a couple of idiots I’ve dated 🙂 but now, at this point in my life, it’s just time to take of me.
So, right now, I’m doing some overdue things such as taking care of my career to a whole new level with the help of my coach, as well as some other physical health stuff such as having a periodontal laser surgery one Thursday 🙂
I can truly feel that stronger force over me, that’s telling me, NOW is the time to do that. So I do.
No, death is never fun, but it’s only for those wh are staying though, so that’s why we need to learn that those who go, it was just their time to go, even though it’s still our right not too like it though. No matter how wise we get, I don’t think we’ll ever like that.
Wow, you sure made up for time lost commenting on my blog today. Thanks so much Adrienne 🙂 So appreciate that!